Three Clicks of the Heel...

...and I am still in the land of Oz. Well, I shouldn't sound so negative, because thinking back on the last month, I have to admit that things are a lot better.

The first couple weeks home from the hospital were spent healing. First, my appetite returned as I backed off of the pain medication. Then, I started sleeping better at night. Slowly but surely, my body systems returned to a more normal state. Surgery and anesthesia really throw things for a loop!

I started home health physical therapy about three weeks ago. I am told by people who see me about once a week that I am moving around better. At first I didn't really believe it, but it's a consistent theme I am hearing, so it must be true. The exercises are hard to do, mentally and physically. The hardest part about it is that I can't count on one day to the next, or one hour to the next, being strong enough to do them. Consistency is important to doing them and getting stronger, so I feel discouraged when I go an entire day without exercising. I call it "falling off the wagon".

The incisions are mostly healed. The pump is okay. "We" have not bonded yet. It is large and I am reminded of it's presence every time I move. It still hurts frequently when I bend or twist just right as I have become more active. I'm told that is normal as to the location of it. Normally it would have been placed just under the skin, but on smaller framed people, it is placed under the facia for a less pronounced appearance. That is the reason it is more tender at this point.

Less pronounced appearance. Hmmpff. I look pregnant on one side of my body. The pump displaces my belly button slightly. Not that my bikini days weren't already long over, this definitely seals the deal. Like I said, "we" have not bonded, but here's the thing...

I am no longer exposing my body to that massive dose of oral Baclofen. I am not a zombie during the day and an insomniac at night. I am no longer tied to the clock. When I start begrudging the pump, I remind myself that I had no choice. It was the right move and I thank God that He made it happen so fast.

With PT and strength training, I am on my way. The pace is painfully slow. But to be fair to myself, it's two steps forward and only one step back at this point. Oh, and that window of 4 to 6 weeks of the risk of infection is narrowing. Thank God! I covet your prayers: to remain infection-free, to continue getting stronger, and to be able to walk independently soon.